Let’s get one thing out of the way: I don’t hate Apartheid Clyde out of any form of jealousy. It’s not because he’s wealthy, or famous, or “successful.” It’s because he’s the perfect embodiment of everything wrong with our world, gift-wrapped in a smug face and a broken social filter.
Apartheid Clyde is capitalism’s final boss. Not because he’s a genius–he’s not–but because he’s really good at taking credit for other people’s work while cosplaying as a messiah. He didn’t invent Tesla. He didn’t found SpaceX from scratch. What he did do was use inherited wealth to buy his way into tech projects already in motion, then spin a mythology around himself with the help of media and a small army of reply guys convinced he’s the second coming of Nikola Tesla, Tony Stark, and Jesus rolled into one.
Spoiler: he’s none of those things.
He’s a union-buster. A climate grifter. A serial breeder who thinks repopulating the Earth with his own genes is a noble cause. He preaches about saving humanity while exploiting workers and cozying up to dictators. He pretends to be a free speech absolutist while banning journalists on Twitter for criticizing him. He bought one of the most important online platforms just to turn it into his personal plaything–a megaphone for crypto scams, far-right rhetoric, and fragile billionaire egos.
He’s not a visionary. He’s a distraction.
Musk sells the illusion that billionaires will save us if we just let them run wild with our data, our money, and our futures. That if we tolerate their tantrums and bow to their brilliance, they’ll build us a utopia on Mars. Meanwhile, here on Earth, wages are stagnant, cities are burning, and the richest man alive is picking fights with disabled employees online.
I don’t hate him because he’s unusual. I hate him because he’s typical–a grotesque symptom of a system that rewards narcissism, hoarding, and unchecked power. A system that mistakes wealth for wisdom. A system that tells us the people breaking the planet are somehow going to be the ones to fix it.
He won’t save us. He can’t. He doesn’t even care to.